sunday night syndromes, kindness i dont deserve.

if i were to list the kindness that God has showered upon me, i will have an inexhaustible list. i was recalling, and thanking God for all the good He has done in my life.. and i felt so spoilt - shuts my mouth up when i think of wanting to complain about clinicals.

thankyoudaphne, you always cheer me up a lot with your simple sweets&lollies/smiles&hugs/wordsofencouragement/sinceresharing. thankyou wenjie, i saw your comment on my post 'sunshinedays' and i felt so thankful and encouraged by your gentle kindness. thankyou christeo, you treated me to macdonaldsfries&nuggest & it's like really amazinglywonderful to serve alongside such a strongbrotherinchrist such as you. thankyou boonhweeong, that you are so humble&loving in your service towards others - that you will not walk the extra mile, but drive the extraMANYmiles in the crazywintercoldmorning to send me to sunshinehospital. thankyou joel for that lastcuppacoffee on wed night, although it was fast turning cold, it warmed me up much and motivated me throughout that night of stress+preparation work. thankyou tracy&melch for your hugs&tolerance when i popped by coffeemin with a very negativeheadfullofcomplainingthoughtsonwednight. thankyou yenchan, you will waste your petrol money to come and pick me up inconviently and send me home inconveniently during the librarytrips. thankyou rachel, your kind words, your kind thoughts, your kind gestures - you are very very very kind & sweet (: thankyou jess, your smses that get read in a hurried every morning as i do last minute readings on the train keeps me sane-ish & calms me down by a notch. thankyou dino, you drive us around a lot without complaining & cares for the people around you, oh and you sometimes have very very wise words to say. and......... you know, the list is reallly reallllyyyyyy rather inexhaustive.............

God, you didnt have to watch your son be humiliated, be physically&verbally abused, and to die on the cross for me. God, you didnt have to grieve when it was all my fault. God, you didnt have to knit me delicately while i was in my mother's womb. God, you didnt have to plan my life out for me so that it will all work out for the good.

see i can go on and on about it. i guess - yah all these things that s been going on lately - i must jot them down, remember them, and honour God for them. and i honour all the people who are in my life too, who helps me and is kind to me although i am undeserving.

i give thanks to you, oh god.

oh god, you are so kind,
how can i ever be deserving of you?